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| So, whoever (and hopefully I'm only talking to a few people, here) who still believes this is Adam Rux obviously doesn't know Adam very well. Not only has this little game I've played pissed Adam off, but it's also given me plenty of laughs at others' expense. Why must all your feelings and horrible awful relationship problems be posted online for you to vent? Most of you are journalists, you know where to buy a notebook I'm sure. Go get one and start a god-damned diary. | | |
| this book has always touched a special part of me that I sometimes forget exists. | | |
| "When we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall into mutually satisfying weirdness- and call it love- true love"..................... I seriously doubt I'm compatible with anyone or anyTHING. I'm like a virus of good tidings. | | |
| So, this Xanga thing is really screwing me over. I figured I could do all this venting and shit online and I don't know, I guess it all felt like I was in a different world, like xanga was a completely different universe and the things I shared there would never come back to haunt me in my real life. I just really want somewhere to talk and someONE to talk to, but I don't know, there's just something wrong with me I guess. Its just like, I know I'm this great person on the inside, but when I'm with people I just can't seem to let it out. So, the other day someone tried to talk to me about my Xanga and I acted like an asshole (but hey, what's new?) I feel so horrible. LIke, inside I was so touched that she cared, but I just sort of... panicked. I feel bad, and I hope she forgives me. I just hope she knows that if I see her in person, I'll act like nothing fazes me. Even though she probably hates me, I really feel a little better, like I have a friend out there or something. How gay am i?
SO, I practically cried last night. I mean, I was drunk, so I'm just gonna blame the liquor, but I don't know, the end of the year is getting close..... Hanging out with Ali was especially hard. She's not gonna be back next year and that sucks. Like, people just come into my life and I know we're still gonna be friends, but it just won't be the same. Saying goodbye is gonna be hard. even though I know I'll see her in the summer, we both know it wont be the same. Its just like, someone's walking around out there with a piece of me, and I'll never get that piece back. Jesus, if I get this pissy over saying goodbye to ONE person, Imagine how I'll be at graduation. I so fuckin glad ali doesn't have a xanga or I'd have to punch her in the vagina. I'm done with this gay stuff for today. Peace Out. | | |
| back in good ol' galva. Its hard to make myself forget the way I used to be in high school when I'm trapped in this shithole town with nothing to do. What the hell is wrong? I mean, I talk to people back at Mizzou why is it that I never had friends in high school. I was such a lsoer and I'd like to just leave it behind me, but I can't. It still hurts you know? these are years I won't ever get back. FUCK. | | |
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